Saturday, November 6, 2010

MOH Money, MOH Problems

FYI: Miss Elephant is awesome. Word. If you want to hear the song again, visit her post! Thanks, E!

Anyway, this post is not about money, this is about my MOH and my problems. I feel like I need to talk about this, because I seriously know that I cannot be the only bride dealing with something like this... and if I am, then I guess I might just be crazy... so watch out, this giraffe is about to get personal.

You see, my Maid of Honor is my big sister, my only sister in fact. Whereas Mr. Giraffe has five brothers and sisters, I only have one sibling, Sis Gee. Based on appearances, you might think that Sis Gee and I get along well. I mean, we're only 2 years apart.

But, in all honestly, we don't. We spend most of our time fighting, arguing, and generally being disagreeable towards each other. It also doesn't help that I live with the Giraffe Rents to save money (more on that later) and she recently moved back home as well. That means Mama Giraffe, Daddy G, Sis Gee, and I are all living together again. . . the same way we did back when I was in a sophomore in high school.

We do get along sometimes, if we go shopping together, or if she's having a problem and is coming to me about it, or if she needs my help with something, or if she has a break at work and feels like she needs to call someone to talk to so she calls me. In a lot of ways, and most of my life, I've felt like the big sister. I've always had to take care of her, y'know like fixing her sink or the latch on her trunk.

I do love Sis Gee, I mean she is my sister and all, but honestly, there are a lot of times that I don't like her; that I really don't like her.

I don't know why, but Sis Gee hates change. I think she really cannot handle it, and because of that, when things do change, she freaks the heck out, and well, for lack of better words, gets mean.

Y'know what's a big change? Um, your little sister getting married.

She just cannot deal with it, she gets angry and rude. She's said many times that she likes Mr. G so he's not the problem, she just hates what I'm doing to our family. She reminds me that I'll no longer be part of our family, that there's no reason for me to want to get married, and that I'm much to young to get married.

There are plenty of other things, but I'll spare you guys because they're just rude and petty. Of course, I shouldn't let them get to me, but who can completely ignore what their family says, eh?

It got to a point where I couldn't deal with all her upsetting snarky comments and I finally asked her what I could do to make her stop. The solution? Oh she'll be my MOH and all, but otherwise, she wants nothing to do with the wedding.

A true girly girl, I bet she's just excited to get a new dress and her hair done all fancy. (Don't even get me started on the fact that I think she hates me for having to pick out a dress she'll have to wear. At this point, we'll never agree on one, and despite the fact that I'm the umm b-r-i-d-e, she doesn't think I should make the decision.)

So why is she holding the coveted title of MOH, instead of say, my closest friends who will also be standing up at our wedding?

Well. . . I don't know. Mr. G asks me the same thing pretty often. She is my sister, but is that reason enough? I mean, if she doesn't think me getting married is a good idea?

Did I feel pressured into it? Well no. . . yes. . . maybe a little. . . maybe a lot. Mama Giraffe, who I'm incredibly close to and totally BFFs with, made it clear that asking Sis Gee would be the right thing to do.

Also, and here's how great my friends are, I honestly think Sis Gee would never forgive me if I gave that title to someone else, but my friends don't mind at all that she's my MOH (even though they know I'm closer to them than I am to Sis Gee). If super good friend BM Mang was my MOH instead, I know Sis Gee would never let me forget it, and it would be hellish I'm sure.

The other day, I was talking to Mr. Giraffe about the wedding, I think it may have been a BM thing, and he goes, "Oh, are we still pretending your sister is going to want to get involved?" To which I told him that we were.

Mr. G and I don't live together so I've been doing a lot of DIY projects on my own, and wouldn't it be nice if my sis/MOH wanted to help out? Of course it would! I would love to have her help me or spend time with me or work on wedding stuff with me, but, y'know, our agreement was that she'll be the MOH, but she just wants nothing to do with the big day.

I'm conflicted, hive, and to put it simply, it just sucks. I think one reason I wanted to blog for the Bee so much is that I wanted to share with a group that is as excited about wedding business as I am. I mean, my BMs are excited, but I work all the time and we have crazy schedules so it's hard to get together sometimes, but I mean, I live with my sister. Imagine if she were excited about the wedding, we could get so much done!

The other day, in a nasty voice, Sis Gee looks at me and says, "Wow, Giraffe, what are you going to do after your wedding because you won't have anything to talk about?" I gave her a look to which she replied, "What, I'm just saying that that's all you talk about."

Okay, I know, I know, that wasn't that bad, but I know she was intentionally trying to be rude and that's the worst part. (Oh and FYI hive, that's not all I talk about. I spend all day talking about other things, and I try not to talk wedding all the time with my other friends who aren't getting married because I know they're not as into it as I am. I was just home with my family that day, I wanted to update them on the planning.)

It's hard because I read all these nice posts about brides and how their girls are so there for them on their big day and every thing's so wonderful. My plan on my big day? Try to ignore Sis Gee as much as possible for fear that she's going to remind me what a bad decision I'm making.

I don't know, and I don't know what's going to happen. I mean, a normal bride wouldn't choose someone that she didn't like to stand up for her, so why did I ask my sister when she wants nothing to do with the wedding?

It may sound petty or catty or make me sound like a horrible person, but I hope that one day whenever Sis Gee gets married, and I'm her MOH, she'll remember how she treated me and realize what a real jerk she was.

Thanks for hearing me out - I'll try to not to sound like such a whiney bride in the future.

It's tough, hive, but please tell me I'm not the only one. Is anyone else questioning someone that is standing up in their wedding? Or dealing with crazy sibling issues?